Vol. 2 of the original Keepapitchinin is now available on Newspapers.com, which will make it possible to share some bits of it here occasionally. They’ve done a beautiful job. Processing Vol. 1 is going to give them a much greater challenge because the printing was so much more primitive, but they’ll get it done if they keep-a-pitchinin! (yuk-yuk! See what I did there?)
This is from the issue of 1 March 1870:
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Regrettably, meanies have stolen content from Keepa in the past! I'm confident you will choose honesty and cite this page like this:
MLA: Parshall, Ardis E. "The Original Keepapitchinin." Keepapitchin.org, 08 Dec 2019, https://keepapitchinin.org/2019/12/08/the-original-keepapitchinin/.
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The times they have been changing
and the newspaper has been
but it’s back in a great blog
as the keepapitchinin
it’s history online now
but the jokes still bring chagrin
and there’s a smile on my face
from the keepapitchinin
(I’ll stop there)
Auteur! Auteur!
Fun development. Thanks. (But I can’t say that I know what “golden boulders” are, or why the reader should be encouraged by their arrival.)
Oh, and this poem works (more or less) sung to the tune of “Improve the Shining Moments” (Hymn no. 226).
I don’t get the “golden boulders,” either, but I suspect it’s an exaggeration of something that was in the culture circa 1870 — a popular use of “golden pebbles”, or “flakes of gold,” or something else that was in popular songs or familiar poetry. That seems to be the way the old Keepa did things — take something familiar, and exaggerate it outrageously.
I haven’t used much of the old Keepa in part because the humor is so dated as to be incomprehensible now, mostly — but there are a few that I do understand and could explain enough to post. It would kill the humor, of course, but make it comprehensible.
People on Twitter yesterday thought this read like a song and were trying to figure out what tune might have been used — thanks for this nomination!
THE MINER’S DREAM.
I dreamt that I dwelt in a Tintic mine,
With rubies and pearls by my side,
And the granite boulders were bubbling ore,
And my ledges were deep and wide.
I had thousands of wagoners hauling the gold,
Pure slabs that were twenty feet thick,
And each man each day for his wage received,
In guerdon, a golden brick.
I had thousands of bushels of precious gems,
And millions of tons of gold,
And in sumptuous purple I sat each day,
And dined and supped and rolled.
The kings of the earth came bending then,
(For their kingdoms I bought and sold,)
And exclaimed, in whispers of fear and awe,
That “the half they had not been told.”
My railway lines ran around the earth,
My ships were on every sea,
While three hundred millions of stalwart men,
All labored and toiled for me.
Twelve fiery steeds drew a golden car,
That glittered with precious gems,
And the carriage lamps were diamond globes,
And were mounted on golden stems.
My orchard was loaded with golden fruit,
And I supped upon golden wine,
And the whole of my glittering, golden wealth
I drew from the Tintic mine.
Much more I dreamed in a similar strain,
As I rolled on my golden bed;
But I woke at length from my dreamy spell,
To find that my gold was lead.
–The Keepapitchinin, Vol. 2, No. 9, Jul 1 1870 p.34.
Haha! I think you have it, Steve — it’s the “golden” that is exaggerate, rather than the “boulders”!
Now I wonder what *this* poem is parodying?!
That’s very cool.